In Searching of Soul mate

This post is kind of sentimental thing for me…. I’m in sentimental moment.. I want to cry … I feel sad… I miss something.. But I cant exactly describe that thing….

I had just watched Korean drama movie which title is Soul mate. It is a nice story about love and soul mate. The movie showed that sometime we come across our soul mate every time but we just didn’t realize it. We coincidently at the same place at the same time but just not realize it. Is it really true? Is soul mate and true love really true?

I always believe in true love and soul mate. But sometime I wonder when I will found it. I already 26 now, but I still haven’t found my true love and soul mate. Or have I found it and just give it up? I already gone through several relationships that is not turn out well. The last one is kind of painful, and most of it was my mistakes. I had been loved several times before, kind of deep love, but I blow it away. Do I will find that deep love again or I already lost my chance? Do I really want to find someone to love or do I just miss to be loved or do I just miss the love.. The feeling of being loved?

Right now, I keep wondering, when will I find love again? I never felt that my heart beat move fast… every time I meet a man my heart still beat the same way, not faster of slower. Is it meaning that I have not found my true love or soul mate? Or maybe I just not allowed my self to fall in love? I want to fall in love again.. I want to feel the love again.
I’m looking for someone… someone who is my true love and soul mate. I don’t want to be with some just because I fit his qualifications. It would be devastated. If I have a relationship with someone again, I want it because we loved each other, kind of true and deep love. I don’t want that he love me because I have good qualifications. I want he love me because who I am, not my qualifications. When will I found that man?

In the searching of soul mate, I remember yesterday class. The professor was talking about equilibrium. He said that in every market or game or condition, there is equilibrium. You just have to find it. And finding it will need a long time and also hard. Is it the same with true love and soul mate? There is exists one true love and one soul mate for everyone… we just have to find it. And find it is hard and need a long time. So is it true?? Will someday I finally found my true love and soul mate?